We got together this weekend with some friends and family. During chips and ribs a few of us guys got to talking about our phones. The iPhone vs the Droid and Mac vs PC. One of the guys is really into Apple and can talk non-stop about the iPhone and his new Mac. He's pretty knowledgeable and should be an Apple salesman as he had us wanting to hit the Apple store and purchase one.
His wife was talking with the girls and smiled at her husbands enthusiasm and said "Look at his passion for that phone. Just think how he could influence people if he were on fire for God". What a powerful statement!
As men we are born with passion. That's why usually the best in any endeavor are men even those industries usually thought of as a woman's world. The top chefs are men, the top designers are men, the top hair dressers are men. Men have the ability to focus on one thing and do it very well. What that one thing is is different in each of us. But what if we turned our passion to God rather than cars, sports, work or our gadgets? What changes could we make in the world?
Need a GPS or looking for a song or to learn Spanish, Apple has an app for that. But what about if we need to heal a marriage or mend a broken heart or forgive a fallen friend? Can our phone help us? Where do we go for the really important things if life? God has an app for that!
How many marriages could be saved if we spent as much time studying our wives as we do our computers or how many kids could be kept off drugs if we spent as much time with them as we do at work? What if the guys who spend their time figuring out how to make a computer that fits in our pocket and plays music spent time figuring out how to increase crop production in third world nations or how to clean up oil from gas spills? What if we each gave that $200 we would spend for that new phone and instead gave it to Feed the Children or a similar charity? How could that money help abused wives or crack addicted babies? Look at the billions we spend on gadgets that will wear out in a year or two. Gods word never wears out! It is timeless and is as relevant today as it was 2000 years ago. Name a human made product with that life span? What if we gave our lives to Jesus instead of this world? What amazing things could we accomplish?
No one will be on their death bed wishing they could hang on a little longer so they can see the 25th generation of iPhone but how many of us will lie there wishing for a few more days to see a grandson graduate or a granddaughter give birth? Technology will continue to change but the human heart won't. The things we need, the things we crave are not those things that man creates. They are the things eternal that span all generations and lifetimes. They are the things that truly make us happy and content. The sooner we figure this out the better we will be and the better our families and society will be. Enjoy your phone but remember it's only a bunch of plastic and silicone. God's word is alive as are our families. Decide for yourself which will comfort you in your times of need.
Monday, May 31, 2010
Saturday, May 15, 2010
How Committed are You?
For three straight Saturdays our small church has held a prayer gathering to pray and listen for God's will. We are seeking guidance for a permanent facility and for the funds needed to make that a reality. Our congregation is about 350 with probably a couple hundred attending each weekend. Our average attendance has been seven people at the prayer gathering. SEVEN! Of those seven, six are on staff or part of a ministry at the church. So if six of seven are already part of the church, how committed are the other 200 or so regular attendees to anything the church is trying to do?
Put on a carnival, serve a free meal or hand out tickets to a free movie screening and people will line up. Ask them to serve or at least show up for an hour to help pray and they're too busy. We have become a bunch of consumers. It's always what's in it for me and not what can I do to give back. Perhaps the difference between giving and taking is does the individual consider giving, in any capacity, a calling from God or is it just something we do when we have time and if it makes us feel good?
Our Pastor is a great guy and someone I respect. He is probably above my judgemental attitude but I still have a lot of spiritual maturing to do. He desires a permanent facility where we can serve the community, our congregation and the world and to bring people to the Lord. He believes this is also God's desire but at this moment it doesn't seem to be the congregations. Now maybe I'll be surprised and everyone will open their checkbooks and let the money flow. Sometimes writing a check is easier then actually having to physically do something.
A day like this also gives you a good sense of who has a true love for the church. Those that continually step up to help are the ones you can count on and every church needs them. They will be there when the others fail to show up or a hurting couple needs someone to talk to. It also forces you to rely on God even more. Not just for the finances but also to cleanse your heart of any impure thoughts about those that you think are not as committed as you. What right do I have to think I know what is in anyones heart? Especially when I ignored God for most of my life. I'm just blessed He has kept His hand on me to bring me to this place in my life.
So, you'll show up to work with a 102 temp. You'll go golfing with pneumonia and boating with the flu but will you show up to seek the Lord when asked? Decide whether the things of this world are more important then eternal things and make your decisions accordingly.
Put on a carnival, serve a free meal or hand out tickets to a free movie screening and people will line up. Ask them to serve or at least show up for an hour to help pray and they're too busy. We have become a bunch of consumers. It's always what's in it for me and not what can I do to give back. Perhaps the difference between giving and taking is does the individual consider giving, in any capacity, a calling from God or is it just something we do when we have time and if it makes us feel good?
Our Pastor is a great guy and someone I respect. He is probably above my judgemental attitude but I still have a lot of spiritual maturing to do. He desires a permanent facility where we can serve the community, our congregation and the world and to bring people to the Lord. He believes this is also God's desire but at this moment it doesn't seem to be the congregations. Now maybe I'll be surprised and everyone will open their checkbooks and let the money flow. Sometimes writing a check is easier then actually having to physically do something.
A day like this also gives you a good sense of who has a true love for the church. Those that continually step up to help are the ones you can count on and every church needs them. They will be there when the others fail to show up or a hurting couple needs someone to talk to. It also forces you to rely on God even more. Not just for the finances but also to cleanse your heart of any impure thoughts about those that you think are not as committed as you. What right do I have to think I know what is in anyones heart? Especially when I ignored God for most of my life. I'm just blessed He has kept His hand on me to bring me to this place in my life.
So, you'll show up to work with a 102 temp. You'll go golfing with pneumonia and boating with the flu but will you show up to seek the Lord when asked? Decide whether the things of this world are more important then eternal things and make your decisions accordingly.
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Where Have All The Men Gone?
Post by Brian Kaufman@ Shrinkthechurch.com.
I’m judgmental. Call it an instinct for survival to quickly size someone up, an insecurity, or just plain pride I tend to think I know you before I know you. Just yesterday I was waiting patiently at the local tire center for my sweet new Michelin 205 55/R16’s when a lady walked in that I instantly sized-up. She was all bedazzled out in her giant sparkly cross purse, studded black hat tilted just slightly, and mobile phone that rang some party tune from the 1970’s. You know instantly what I thought? I thought, “this lady is moderately involved in a local mega-church women’s ministry.” Yeah, I’m judgmental. But, it got me thinking about the contrast of men’s involvement in virtually every area of local mega-church ministries to women’s involvement at the same churches. Where have all the men gone?
There’s a book called, “Why Men Hate Going to Church,” that I only made it about half-way thru just to pick up another book called, “Why Men Hate Reading.” Ok, that second part was a lie, but, the first part is true. The author spent much of his argument focused on the dominant feminine characteristics of the church. I agree that mega-church culture has a tendency to be a bit on the dainty side, and as a result mega-churches are trying to overcorrect with programs and series intended to attract the fictitious, stereotypical man. This man is about 6′2″, 225 lbs, wears flannel shirts, subscribes to the Nascar channel and just happens to be a kickboxing logger who lives in the desert. So, naturally, the church needs to cater to this man by creating over-the-top series’ and programs to engage this man and get his Aqua-Velva-splashing face through the door.
But, there are no loggers where I live. In fact my guess is that the men that do live in the surrounding community neither want to fully engage in the local effeminate church culture nor be forced into a box of the stereotypical man. Meanwhile, the women’s ministry is growing like gangbusters – involved all over the place and carrying much of the local church load. So what’s a mega-church to do?
Simplify. Don’t assume who I am, don’t try to fix me, and don’t give me more to check off my list. Here’s a few things you should know about me as a man:
* I am not a good singer and don’t feel comfortable hitting the high notes that the modern worship leader with his tight jeans and deep v-neck carries with ease
* I don’t like to lift my hands and spin around
* I want to hang out with other guys but not in an environment where I’m pressured or expected to engage for the sole purpose of connecting and talk about my feelings
* I don’t think about beer, sports, girls, sex and fighting all day long
* I just spent a week solving problems, putting out fires, worrying about next week, stressing about my to-do list and going down the mental list of if I’ve been a good father, husband, employee, student, etc. I really don’t want to feel like I’m not good enough because I haven’t plugged into the latest men’s group, mission trip or retreat
* I have difficulty processing someone telling me I’m the bride of Christ
* Words like engage, connect, amazing, spiritual growth, Bible study, prayer circle, feelings and “stand up and say hello to someone around you” don’t quite have the effect on me that you’d hope
* I don’t visit your website, Facebook or follow you on Twitter, so communicate with me some other way
* I’m exhausted and I don’t want to feel judged
Men don’t need more programs, Facebook requests, and church to-do items to add to their list. But, the church thinks they do and as a result pushes most men even further away. I recognize there are a lot of men who do “plug in” to the local church, but, let’s be honest, it is completely disproportionate to the women.
So, where have all the men gone? We are here, but we’re scared to death. We’re scared to be judged and it’s all we can think about because we spend our days putting a face on and judging others. We’re scared to commit to yet another thing because when we can’t meet the commitment we feel like a failure…and most of us already feel like failures at least once a week. We’re hesitant to be categorized into a church program because we neither want to fit in a church box nor be labeled.
Believe it or not, guys WANT to connect with other guys, just not in the way the local church always wants us to. We desire that community – we were built for it. But, we tend not to be maintainers. We don’t call each other to see how our week’s are going or how that “sin issue” is working out. We need excuses to all be at the same place at the same time doing something other than engaging with each other – that will happen naturally between half times, commercial breaks or rest stops. We need the location without the expectation. Then, with a little love, encouragement and direction, you’ll see us at our best. We will begin to want to engage in the local church because we are conquering side-by-side with other men. Got a problem? We will solve it. Got a mission’s trip where little kids are without water, being sexually abused or some other kind of injustice, we’ll knock down the door with such a passion to see things made right that you’ll likely need to restrain us. Got a bunch of guys getting together to pray? Well…that’s a little more difficult but we’ll try our best.
So, local mega-church, you want to engage with us and make us a local and global force for Christ? Put down the bedazzler and start real conversations with us. We need it to be simple, non-threatening, and with as little expectation as possible. Over time and mixed with some grace and truth you’ll see us gain confidence in not only our identity as a man but our identity as Christ-followers. And then we’ll start to engage. We will invite our friends. We might even put your church bumper sticker on our vehicles…but probably not.
I’m judgmental. Call it an instinct for survival to quickly size someone up, an insecurity, or just plain pride I tend to think I know you before I know you. Just yesterday I was waiting patiently at the local tire center for my sweet new Michelin 205 55/R16’s when a lady walked in that I instantly sized-up. She was all bedazzled out in her giant sparkly cross purse, studded black hat tilted just slightly, and mobile phone that rang some party tune from the 1970’s. You know instantly what I thought? I thought, “this lady is moderately involved in a local mega-church women’s ministry.” Yeah, I’m judgmental. But, it got me thinking about the contrast of men’s involvement in virtually every area of local mega-church ministries to women’s involvement at the same churches. Where have all the men gone?
There’s a book called, “Why Men Hate Going to Church,” that I only made it about half-way thru just to pick up another book called, “Why Men Hate Reading.” Ok, that second part was a lie, but, the first part is true. The author spent much of his argument focused on the dominant feminine characteristics of the church. I agree that mega-church culture has a tendency to be a bit on the dainty side, and as a result mega-churches are trying to overcorrect with programs and series intended to attract the fictitious, stereotypical man. This man is about 6′2″, 225 lbs, wears flannel shirts, subscribes to the Nascar channel and just happens to be a kickboxing logger who lives in the desert. So, naturally, the church needs to cater to this man by creating over-the-top series’ and programs to engage this man and get his Aqua-Velva-splashing face through the door.
But, there are no loggers where I live. In fact my guess is that the men that do live in the surrounding community neither want to fully engage in the local effeminate church culture nor be forced into a box of the stereotypical man. Meanwhile, the women’s ministry is growing like gangbusters – involved all over the place and carrying much of the local church load. So what’s a mega-church to do?
Simplify. Don’t assume who I am, don’t try to fix me, and don’t give me more to check off my list. Here’s a few things you should know about me as a man:
* I am not a good singer and don’t feel comfortable hitting the high notes that the modern worship leader with his tight jeans and deep v-neck carries with ease
* I don’t like to lift my hands and spin around
* I want to hang out with other guys but not in an environment where I’m pressured or expected to engage for the sole purpose of connecting and talk about my feelings
* I don’t think about beer, sports, girls, sex and fighting all day long
* I just spent a week solving problems, putting out fires, worrying about next week, stressing about my to-do list and going down the mental list of if I’ve been a good father, husband, employee, student, etc. I really don’t want to feel like I’m not good enough because I haven’t plugged into the latest men’s group, mission trip or retreat
* I have difficulty processing someone telling me I’m the bride of Christ
* Words like engage, connect, amazing, spiritual growth, Bible study, prayer circle, feelings and “stand up and say hello to someone around you” don’t quite have the effect on me that you’d hope
* I don’t visit your website, Facebook or follow you on Twitter, so communicate with me some other way
* I’m exhausted and I don’t want to feel judged
Men don’t need more programs, Facebook requests, and church to-do items to add to their list. But, the church thinks they do and as a result pushes most men even further away. I recognize there are a lot of men who do “plug in” to the local church, but, let’s be honest, it is completely disproportionate to the women.
So, where have all the men gone? We are here, but we’re scared to death. We’re scared to be judged and it’s all we can think about because we spend our days putting a face on and judging others. We’re scared to commit to yet another thing because when we can’t meet the commitment we feel like a failure…and most of us already feel like failures at least once a week. We’re hesitant to be categorized into a church program because we neither want to fit in a church box nor be labeled.
Believe it or not, guys WANT to connect with other guys, just not in the way the local church always wants us to. We desire that community – we were built for it. But, we tend not to be maintainers. We don’t call each other to see how our week’s are going or how that “sin issue” is working out. We need excuses to all be at the same place at the same time doing something other than engaging with each other – that will happen naturally between half times, commercial breaks or rest stops. We need the location without the expectation. Then, with a little love, encouragement and direction, you’ll see us at our best. We will begin to want to engage in the local church because we are conquering side-by-side with other men. Got a problem? We will solve it. Got a mission’s trip where little kids are without water, being sexually abused or some other kind of injustice, we’ll knock down the door with such a passion to see things made right that you’ll likely need to restrain us. Got a bunch of guys getting together to pray? Well…that’s a little more difficult but we’ll try our best.
So, local mega-church, you want to engage with us and make us a local and global force for Christ? Put down the bedazzler and start real conversations with us. We need it to be simple, non-threatening, and with as little expectation as possible. Over time and mixed with some grace and truth you’ll see us gain confidence in not only our identity as a man but our identity as Christ-followers. And then we’ll start to engage. We will invite our friends. We might even put your church bumper sticker on our vehicles…but probably not.
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Money spent wisely
Our small church is trying to raise funds so we can move from the high school we currently meet at to a permanent site. In doing so we anticipate our attendance to increase and our outreach to the community to expand. It will require the congregation to dig into their pockets and part with more of their hard earned money.
Another blog I was reading today talked about a new JD Hayworth ad which is currently just on the web. The campaign is asking for donations so they can get it to TV.
Do you realize in the election of 2008, $5.3 billion was spent by candidates, political parties and interest groups on congressional and presidential races. This didn't even include all the local races. According to OpenSecrets John McCain has raised $16,000,000 for his current race and has $26+ million on hand.
In the big scheme of things are we wiser to spend money helping the poor or enlisting volunteers for Hayworth? Is it wiser to spend money to dig wells in Africa or watch Obama on the tube? If all we have is God's and we are only temporary stewards of His money how would He want it spent? If we are to store up things eternal are we better off giving our $100 to Feed The Children or John McCain?
How much good could be done in the world with the billions spent on hyping the next savior? No matter the party or politician it seems hard to justify the kind of money we spend on people who will sell us down the river in a heartbeat. Our current economic situation should have woken people up. They spent billions to buy homes and invest in stocks to only see their networth crumble. Anything or anyone bought with money can disappoint and devastate our lives. The things that are precious in God's eyes are not those things money can buy. Perhaps we should trust God to put into power the person He deems fit and use His money to help those who really need it.
To my good friend who is part of this whole process, it's not an indictment of you its just my reflection on how far society has fallen and what and who we feel are worthy of our (Gods) money.
Another blog I was reading today talked about a new JD Hayworth ad which is currently just on the web. The campaign is asking for donations so they can get it to TV.
Do you realize in the election of 2008, $5.3 billion was spent by candidates, political parties and interest groups on congressional and presidential races. This didn't even include all the local races. According to OpenSecrets John McCain has raised $16,000,000 for his current race and has $26+ million on hand.
In the big scheme of things are we wiser to spend money helping the poor or enlisting volunteers for Hayworth? Is it wiser to spend money to dig wells in Africa or watch Obama on the tube? If all we have is God's and we are only temporary stewards of His money how would He want it spent? If we are to store up things eternal are we better off giving our $100 to Feed The Children or John McCain?
How much good could be done in the world with the billions spent on hyping the next savior? No matter the party or politician it seems hard to justify the kind of money we spend on people who will sell us down the river in a heartbeat. Our current economic situation should have woken people up. They spent billions to buy homes and invest in stocks to only see their networth crumble. Anything or anyone bought with money can disappoint and devastate our lives. The things that are precious in God's eyes are not those things money can buy. Perhaps we should trust God to put into power the person He deems fit and use His money to help those who really need it.
To my good friend who is part of this whole process, it's not an indictment of you its just my reflection on how far society has fallen and what and who we feel are worthy of our (Gods) money.
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