I'm Bored!

When did society get to the point where we need to fill every hour of every day?

Our daughter and her husband are visiting from Texas and we are constantly asking them if they have something they want to do. Life is so full that the thought of sitting and doing nothing is a foreign concept. Somehow years ago families were able to get together and play games or read or take walks and talk. Today we are all tethered to a phone that gives us minute by minute updates on the world, friends and family. How did we survive without knowing within seconds that little Johnny said his first word? Would our quality of life diminish if we didn't get to see the Christmas pictures within hours after they were taken? Is it really that important to let everyone know that Wal-Mart is having a sale on hamster food?

In all the hustle and bustle of today when do we have time to really sit and talk to each other? When do we have time to quiet our minds to hear God speak to us? Perhaps it's time to get back to basics and live simpler and possibly happier lives.

Where's the line for Jesus?

A song that has been going around the last couple years asks this question.

What if Santa was at the mall and so was Jesus and you could only talk to one of them. Who would have the longest line? One guy is jolly, hands out candy and asks what he can bring you for Christmas in a couple weeks. The other guy looks pretty normal. No red suit or elf's. He has a brightness in his eyes but that's about it. He also knows all about you just like Santa but He isn't promising any gifts under the tree. He is offering you a gift but you won't fully appreciate it until you die.

So you have a dilemma. One guy is offering eternity but you have to wait while the other offers instant gratification. Which line is longer?

Being unique

Where I live people seem to have accepted mediocrity. The level or quality of work around here is poor but people seem to just look the other way rather than ask for more. I think parents have also gotten use to accepting mediocrity from their kids. We tend to raise our kids to fit the standard norms. Don't be too weird, don't dress different or call attention to yourself. But I have to wonder is that God's plan? Hasn't God made us in His image? I don't believe there is a cookie cutter in Heaven where people are made like carbon copies one after another. God has given each of us our own uniqueness, our own kwirks and gifts. We all aren't made to be athletes or musicians. We all aren't designed to go to college or to be pastors. We are individuals with our own abilities and passions.

For too long parents have tried to mold their kids into what they think the kids should be without really looking at the talents of their kids. Parents want their kids to "fit in". If being "normal" is such a great thing why is society in the shape it's in? If fitting in means conforming to the ways of this world than I say it's better to be non-conforming. What are the redeeming values in society today? It's hard to find many but if you did the opposite of what most people do you may be astonished what God does in your life.

Take a few chances. Step out of the norm. Follow God's call for your life wherever that may lead.

I have much to learn

Lately I've been seeking God and His word on the church. I don't think we are following the examples given us by the disciples. I don't think we understand the importance of relationship and how that fits into "church". Sometimes I just want to drop out and do things the way I think they should be done.

It's at these times that I begin to hear a small whisper that tells me to take a step back. It's these times when someone comes up to me and says "maybe you don't need the church but maybe the church needs you". It's at this point that while having a dialogue with my sister about church she indicates to me that I start to sound all knowing. It's during these times that I begin to see that I have much to learn.

While I will never stop questioning, I need to do it from a position of humility. While I still will not accept the answer "that's the way it's always been done". I will not condemn something just because it has been done a certain way for years. I will realize we are not all the same but will still strive to lead by example to all those in my sphere of influence. As my pastor put it "I don't have to save the world, that was taken care of by Jesus".

So God I ask you to give me your wisdom, grace and love but also the continuing desire to seek the truth wherever that may take me. Guide me as I travel this path you have me on, not knowing where I'm going. Always be thankful for those who have taken on the challenge of guiding your people and never be a hindrance to them. It's from all of your imperfect people, I being more imperfect than many, that I can learn so much.

It may not be what you think

My wife's father is 90 and having some heart trouble. He has finally had to go into a skilled nursing facility 1500 miles from where we live. This has put stress on my wife and her siblings who live by her Dad. One of the biggest struggles they are having is where he should stay and who is in charge. While we all want what is the best for him there is an elephant in the room no one wants to see.

My father-in-law won't be around much longer and his quality of life has gone downhill but he hangs in there, why? Is his illness just a straight forward event or is there more to this? I believe God wants to use his sickness for a greater purpose. My wife and the rest of her family have never been very close and they relate to each other in a very superficial manner. I think this whole experience is to bring about trust, grace, patience and love among the family.

God in His infinite wisdom sees what we can't. He can use any circumstance to teach, guide or heal us if we allow Him. Maybe this isn't about an old man's death but about the growth in his kids towards each other and their Creator.

But we look good

Looking out my back window this morning I was watching a group of women golfers teeing it up on the par 3 behind our house. One gal in particular caught my attention. She had the standard golf attire with the visor, shoes, blouse and golf skirt. She teed the ball up and then stood behind it to get her line of where she wanted to hit it. She took a few nice looking practice swings and then approached the ball to hit. She took a mighty swing at the ball and it flew about 40 yards into the pond. You could tell she had no idea what the problem was.

It seems our Christian life so often is like that. We have our Bible, we attend church, we join a small group, we may even serve in some other way on the side. From the outside we look like a functioning Christian but then something goes wrong. We stumble or our kids get into trouble or our marriage falls apart. How could that happen, we were doing all the right things?

Like our golfer, there is more to Christianity then how we look. Christianity is not about how much we serve (although that is important), it's not about the Bible we have or how many times we make it to church. Christianity is about what Jesus has placed in our hearts. It's not rules and appearance it's surrender, sacrifice and becoming Christ-like. It's what we do when only God will know. It's taking what we have learned from the Bible and actually putting it into practice.

Our golfers problem was not her appearance, her swing or her golf knowledge. Her problem was a head problem. She couldn't transfer her book knowledge into actual practice. There are so many that know scripture but fail to put that knowledge into practice. Jesus looks at our heart not our Bible version. He looks at our walk and not our talk.

Building your Marriage Ark

Thousands of years ago Noah began building an ark for an impending flood. Never mind that he had never seen the rain or that it would take decades to complete. He was ridiculed, mocked and was probably considered a nut. He was preparing for a catastrophe even though he had no reason to believe one would occur except that God told him it would.

We should take the same preparation in our marriages. Even if you've never had an argument or slight misunderstanding (really?) we all know a marriage catastrophe is coming. Listen to those who have been down the road a bit and they will tell you storm clouds are on the horizon.

Take heed, listen and prepare. Have a mentor couple that you can go to in time of crisis. Take classes and attend marriage seminars. Read books or join a marriage small group. All these can build your marriage ark to keep you and your family safe from the ravages of a storm.

Serving God while losing Him?

I am guilty, as I think many are, of trying to serve God but not growing in Him. We keep ourselves busy helping others, serving in ministry and fellowshipping with fellow believers. But while we are serving the Kingdom we forget about our quiet time with Him. What good does it do us to help others but lose our relationship with the One that makes it all possible? God never placed ministry above our relationship with Him or our families. Get back to basics and place God first and your spouse next. Everything else will fall in place.

Secret to a lasting marriage

There are thousands of books on how to have a better marriage. Follow this formula,read this article or find a new spouse. In reality the answer is much simpler but maybe harder to do. It's realizing marriage is not the ultimate goal it is just a step in our journey to heaven.

Marriage is not the end of fun, not the end of spontaneity, or the end of one’s freedom. Marriage if done right is the beginning to living our life as God designed it. It is learning to sacrifice for others, love someone when you may not like them at that moment, its learning patience and forgiveness for the inevitable hurts you will endure. Marriage is giving up your life for your spouse and kids. Marriage is seeking help from a source greater than your own. Marriage is of this world and temporary. What we learn and the relationship we develop with God during our marriage is eternal.

It is not the marriage relationship that is the problem it’s the God relationship that needs to be worked on. In working on our relationships with God we will improve our marriages.

Making sense of a senseless death

Yesterday we attended a large memorial service. The church where the service was held was filled to capacity. There were almost one thousand messages to Jason on a memorial site that was set up a week ago on Facebook. Jason was not famous, rich or politically connected. He didn’t accumulate a large number of friends over a long life. He wasn’t an owner of a business or from a well-connected family. So, what made him so special?

He was a 39 year old father of two that was under paid, worked hard and loved music. He was a perfectionist. He gave of himself and was the worship pastor of a local church. One other thing to know about Jason, he had fought a battle within himself for years and last week committed suicide.

We did not personally know him but through his music found great inspiration and could sense his love of the Lord. We enjoyed his music so much that we debated switching churches just because of him. The messages on Facebook show his capacity to ignite a whole segment of people across three churches and fifteen years. Jason brought people to Christ. Through his songs you could feel the love and compassion that our savior has for us but sadly Jason apparently could not feel those things. He would pour his soul into his music and sing of God’s greatness and all the while he was in the fight for his life. We had no idea of his struggles and I’m sure that’s how he wanted it. But now he has left a void not only in our Christian family but also in his earthly family.

So how do we make sense of tragedies like this? How can someone become so despondent that the only way out seems to be death? Add to that that he was a child of God and it’s even harder to imagine. Is this how a follower of Christ is rewarded? Is this any different than if he wasn’t a believer? There are some things that happen that we can never understand. A child is killed by a drunk driver, a spouse commits adultery or gets hooked on drugs. Where do we go for the answers?

Death is meaningless unless looked at through the eyes of a Christian and Christianity doesn’t make much sense without the reality of heaven. The reason we suffer, endure, love and forgive is not to bring us acclaim here on earth but to help us grow and guide others on our way to eternity. If there is no heaven how can any of this make sense? We also need to remember that we can’t do this on our own. We need guidance which comes from the Holy Spirit. It is a constant daily renewal of our minds by reading Gods word.

If nothing else maybe Jason’s death is a wakeup call to those of us still standing on this planet. Maybe Jason is screaming out to us that life is short and precious! None of us are guaranteed tomorrow. Yesterday is done and all we have is today. It’s called the present because it is a gift from God to be unwrapped and opened. Every day we are to enjoy this gift and be thankful that we have another day to be with our loved ones. We become so consumed with the day to day minutia that we often don’t take the time to enjoy the blessings we are given each day. What are we willing to give up if we knew that tomorrow or next week or next month we or our spouse or son or daughter would be gone forever? Would we give up work, our home or our precious time for just one more hour or one more day with our departed? We can’t let this world consume us. Each day we all are one day closer to the end and none of us know the date of that final day.

The memorial today was amazing. The singing, the music and the tributes. His ten year old daughter sang a song to her dad. It was a celebration, for now Jason was finally free to be the man God had intended.

When put into perspective does it really matter who wins the next election or the Super Bowl or what car we drive? Think about what is really important. Does someone need to die before we tell them they are special? Does someone need to die before we stop thinking about ourselves? Pray for Jason’s family and remember Jason is probably singing the most beautiful songs he has ever sung. His demons are gone and he is at peace. Don’t weep for him but be joyful as he sits with Christ and waits for the time when he will be reunited with his family. I’m sure this is how he would want to be remembered.

Dad's Day

This weekend most of us will be thinking about our Dads. Some will send a card or make a call. Others will take Dad out to eat or golfing. Unfortunately some will not have any good thoughts about their Dad. He was either absent, abusive or just not involved. While we spend Fathers Day usually thinking about our Dads perhaps we should change our focus.

The majority of us are Dads or will be Dads in the future. Instead of focusing on the past and our Dads maybe we should focus on the future and what kind of a Dad we are or will be. What will our kids think about us on future Dad Days?

We all will leave a legacy whether we like it or not. Some will be good and some not so good. What will your legacy be? Will the kids want to spend Fathers Day with you or will they hope they don't have to see or talk to you? Will they have anything in common with you or will you be a stranger? Will their own marriages be solid because of the time you invested in yours and will they thank you for it?.

This Fathers Day, give your Dad props if you want. Take him to lunch or a game but also look at your life. Five, ten or twenty years from now what will YOUR kids think when Fathers Day comes around?

God vs the iPhone

We got together this weekend with some friends and family. During chips and ribs a few of us guys got to talking about our phones. The iPhone vs the Droid and Mac vs PC. One of the guys is really into Apple and can talk non-stop about the iPhone and his new Mac. He's pretty knowledgeable and should be an Apple salesman as he had us wanting to hit the Apple store and purchase one.

His wife was talking with the girls and smiled at her husbands enthusiasm and said "Look at his passion for that phone. Just think how he could influence people if he were on fire for God". What a powerful statement!

As men we are born with passion. That's why usually the best in any endeavor are men even those industries usually thought of as a woman's world. The top chefs are men, the top designers are men, the top hair dressers are men. Men have the ability to focus on one thing and do it very well. What that one thing is is different in each of us. But what if we turned our passion to God rather than cars, sports, work or our gadgets? What changes could we make in the world?

Need a GPS or looking for a song or to learn Spanish, Apple has an app for that. But what about if we need to heal a marriage or mend a broken heart or forgive a fallen friend? Can our phone help us? Where do we go for the really important things if life? God has an app for that!

How many marriages could be saved if we spent as much time studying our wives as we do our computers or how many kids could be kept off drugs if we spent as much time with them as we do at work? What if the guys who spend their time figuring out how to make a computer that fits in our pocket and plays music spent time figuring out how to increase crop production in third world nations or how to clean up oil from gas spills? What if we each gave that $200 we would spend for that new phone and instead gave it to Feed the Children or a similar charity? How could that money help abused wives or crack addicted babies? Look at the billions we spend on gadgets that will wear out in a year or two. Gods word never wears out! It is timeless and is as relevant today as it was 2000 years ago. Name a human made product with that life span? What if we gave our lives to Jesus instead of this world? What amazing things could we accomplish?

No one will be on their death bed wishing they could hang on a little longer so they can see the 25th generation of iPhone but how many of us will lie there wishing for a few more days to see a grandson graduate or a granddaughter give birth? Technology will continue to change but the human heart won't. The things we need, the things we crave are not those things that man creates. They are the things eternal that span all generations and lifetimes. They are the things that truly make us happy and content. The sooner we figure this out the better we will be and the better our families and society will be. Enjoy your phone but remember it's only a bunch of plastic and silicone. God's word is alive as are our families. Decide for yourself which will comfort you in your times of need.

How Committed are You?

For three straight Saturdays our small church has held a prayer gathering to pray and listen for God's will. We are seeking guidance for a permanent facility and for the funds needed to make that a reality. Our congregation is about 350 with probably a couple hundred attending each weekend. Our average attendance has been seven people at the prayer gathering. SEVEN! Of those seven, six are on staff or part of a ministry at the church. So if six of seven are already part of the church, how committed are the other 200 or so regular attendees to anything the church is trying to do?

Put on a carnival, serve a free meal or hand out tickets to a free movie screening and people will line up. Ask them to serve or at least show up for an hour to help pray and they're too busy. We have become a bunch of consumers. It's always what's in it for me and not what can I do to give back. Perhaps the difference between giving and taking is does the individual consider giving, in any capacity, a calling from God or is it just something we do when we have time and if it makes us feel good?

Our Pastor is a great guy and someone I respect. He is probably above my judgemental attitude but I still have a lot of spiritual maturing to do. He desires a permanent facility where we can serve the community, our congregation and the world and to bring people to the Lord. He believes this is also God's desire but at this moment it doesn't seem to be the congregations. Now maybe I'll be surprised and everyone will open their checkbooks and let the money flow. Sometimes writing a check is easier then actually having to physically do something.

A day like this also gives you a good sense of who has a true love for the church. Those that continually step up to help are the ones you can count on and every church needs them. They will be there when the others fail to show up or a hurting couple needs someone to talk to. It also forces you to rely on God even more. Not just for the finances but also to cleanse your heart of any impure thoughts about those that you think are not as committed as you. What right do I have to think I know what is in anyones heart? Especially when I ignored God for most of my life. I'm just blessed He has kept His hand on me to bring me to this place in my life.

So, you'll show up to work with a 102 temp. You'll go golfing with pneumonia and boating with the flu but will you show up to seek the Lord when asked? Decide whether the things of this world are more important then eternal things and make your decisions accordingly.

Where Have All The Men Gone?

Post by Brian Kaufman@ Shrinkthechurch.com.

I’m judgmental. Call it an instinct for survival to quickly size someone up, an insecurity, or just plain pride I tend to think I know you before I know you. Just yesterday I was waiting patiently at the local tire center for my sweet new Michelin 205 55/R16’s when a lady walked in that I instantly sized-up. She was all bedazzled out in her giant sparkly cross purse, studded black hat tilted just slightly, and mobile phone that rang some party tune from the 1970’s. You know instantly what I thought? I thought, “this lady is moderately involved in a local mega-church women’s ministry.” Yeah, I’m judgmental. But, it got me thinking about the contrast of men’s involvement in virtually every area of local mega-church ministries to women’s involvement at the same churches. Where have all the men gone?

There’s a book called, “Why Men Hate Going to Church,” that I only made it about half-way thru just to pick up another book called, “Why Men Hate Reading.” Ok, that second part was a lie, but, the first part is true. The author spent much of his argument focused on the dominant feminine characteristics of the church. I agree that mega-church culture has a tendency to be a bit on the dainty side, and as a result mega-churches are trying to overcorrect with programs and series intended to attract the fictitious, stereotypical man. This man is about 6′2″, 225 lbs, wears flannel shirts, subscribes to the Nascar channel and just happens to be a kickboxing logger who lives in the desert. So, naturally, the church needs to cater to this man by creating over-the-top series’ and programs to engage this man and get his Aqua-Velva-splashing face through the door.

But, there are no loggers where I live. In fact my guess is that the men that do live in the surrounding community neither want to fully engage in the local effeminate church culture nor be forced into a box of the stereotypical man. Meanwhile, the women’s ministry is growing like gangbusters – involved all over the place and carrying much of the local church load. So what’s a mega-church to do?

Simplify. Don’t assume who I am, don’t try to fix me, and don’t give me more to check off my list. Here’s a few things you should know about me as a man:

* I am not a good singer and don’t feel comfortable hitting the high notes that the modern worship leader with his tight jeans and deep v-neck carries with ease
* I don’t like to lift my hands and spin around
* I want to hang out with other guys but not in an environment where I’m pressured or expected to engage for the sole purpose of connecting and talk about my feelings
* I don’t think about beer, sports, girls, sex and fighting all day long
* I just spent a week solving problems, putting out fires, worrying about next week, stressing about my to-do list and going down the mental list of if I’ve been a good father, husband, employee, student, etc. I really don’t want to feel like I’m not good enough because I haven’t plugged into the latest men’s group, mission trip or retreat
* I have difficulty processing someone telling me I’m the bride of Christ
* Words like engage, connect, amazing, spiritual growth, Bible study, prayer circle, feelings and “stand up and say hello to someone around you” don’t quite have the effect on me that you’d hope
* I don’t visit your website, Facebook or follow you on Twitter, so communicate with me some other way
* I’m exhausted and I don’t want to feel judged

Men don’t need more programs, Facebook requests, and church to-do items to add to their list. But, the church thinks they do and as a result pushes most men even further away. I recognize there are a lot of men who do “plug in” to the local church, but, let’s be honest, it is completely disproportionate to the women.

So, where have all the men gone? We are here, but we’re scared to death. We’re scared to be judged and it’s all we can think about because we spend our days putting a face on and judging others. We’re scared to commit to yet another thing because when we can’t meet the commitment we feel like a failure…and most of us already feel like failures at least once a week. We’re hesitant to be categorized into a church program because we neither want to fit in a church box nor be labeled.

Believe it or not, guys WANT to connect with other guys, just not in the way the local church always wants us to. We desire that community – we were built for it. But, we tend not to be maintainers. We don’t call each other to see how our week’s are going or how that “sin issue” is working out. We need excuses to all be at the same place at the same time doing something other than engaging with each other – that will happen naturally between half times, commercial breaks or rest stops. We need the location without the expectation. Then, with a little love, encouragement and direction, you’ll see us at our best. We will begin to want to engage in the local church because we are conquering side-by-side with other men. Got a problem? We will solve it. Got a mission’s trip where little kids are without water, being sexually abused or some other kind of injustice, we’ll knock down the door with such a passion to see things made right that you’ll likely need to restrain us. Got a bunch of guys getting together to pray? Well…that’s a little more difficult but we’ll try our best.

So, local mega-church, you want to engage with us and make us a local and global force for Christ? Put down the bedazzler and start real conversations with us. We need it to be simple, non-threatening, and with as little expectation as possible. Over time and mixed with some grace and truth you’ll see us gain confidence in not only our identity as a man but our identity as Christ-followers. And then we’ll start to engage. We will invite our friends. We might even put your church bumper sticker on our vehicles…but probably not.

Money spent wisely

Our small church is trying to raise funds so we can move from the high school we currently meet at to a permanent site. In doing so we anticipate our attendance to increase and our outreach to the community to expand. It will require the congregation to dig into their pockets and part with more of their hard earned money.

Another blog I was reading today talked about a new JD Hayworth ad which is currently just on the web. The campaign is asking for donations so they can get it to TV.

Do you realize in the election of 2008, $5.3 billion was spent by candidates, political parties and interest groups on congressional and presidential races. This didn't even include all the local races. According to OpenSecrets John McCain has raised $16,000,000 for his current race and has $26+ million on hand.

In the big scheme of things are we wiser to spend money helping the poor or enlisting volunteers for Hayworth? Is it wiser to spend money to dig wells in Africa or watch Obama on the tube? If all we have is God's and we are only temporary stewards of His money how would He want it spent? If we are to store up things eternal are we better off giving our $100 to Feed The Children or John McCain?

How much good could be done in the world with the billions spent on hyping the next savior? No matter the party or politician it seems hard to justify the kind of money we spend on people who will sell us down the river in a heartbeat. Our current economic situation should have woken people up. They spent billions to buy homes and invest in stocks to only see their networth crumble. Anything or anyone bought with money can disappoint and devastate our lives. The things that are precious in God's eyes are not those things money can buy. Perhaps we should trust God to put into power the person He deems fit and use His money to help those who really need it.

To my good friend who is part of this whole process, it's not an indictment of you its just my reflection on how far society has fallen and what and who we feel are worthy of our (Gods) money.

God's Heavenly Dumpster

A few years ago we packed up everything we needed and moved 1500 miles to get a new start. After 17 years of living in the same house you tend to accumulate a lot of stuff. Some of the stuff, are things you had to have but only used once. Some is stuff you’ve had forever. Things like high school yearbooks, trophies and ribbons from childhood when you were the next superstar and plaques and awards from business achievements. When you start packing things up you begin to realize how many of your closets and cupboards are filled with memorabilia. With limited space we began tossing things out. Was I ever going to need that trophy from 1971? Will anyone ever care my wife’s organization won national association of the year in 1998? So into the dumpster it all went. Some of it was pretty hard to part with. I’m not sure why except that we always want to relive the glory days. We arrived at our new home and unpacked everything and it was amazing, we didn’t miss a thing we threw out! For years we held onto stuff that made not one bit of difference in our life.

I think this is how God looks at us. We hold onto our triumphs and our failures of the past and we let them define us. God doesn’t judge us by where we’ve been He looks at where we are and where we are headed. God tells us to leave our past in His heavenly dumpster and He will dispose of it. It just takes up space and weighs us down. He tells us to store up those things eternal and to let go of our worldly possessions. It’s amazing how light and free we feel when we concentrate on the eternal things. We won’t really know how to live until we stop worrying about what everyone thinks and only concern ourselves with what Christ thinks.

Start unloading the baggage that has been taking up space in your life. God’s dumpster is always open and it’s never full.

Pets listen better than Men!

In a recent poll a third of women say their pets listen to them better than their husbands. Is this true? Probably! Communication is one of a wife's big complaints with her hubby. Let's face it men, we don't listen very well.

Is this a genetic thing or an acquired skill? Probably both. Studies show that women speak up to 3 times as many words in a day as men (some say that's because they have to repeat everything). As men we are born to fix things. When our wife comes to us with a problem we naturally want to fix it but often she doesn't want it fixed she just needs someone to listen and this is where the dog is smarter than we are.

Women love to vent, so let them. Put down the remote and listen! It isn't physically painful and can yield many benefits. Show your Mrs. you love her as much as the cat does by listening.

And ladies don't think you're all that either. Almost 20% of the men say their pet also listens better than you.

Leader of the Pack

Last night I was looking out the front window and saw a group of Javelinas walking down the street. A dog across the street started barking and the lead male took point and the others got behind him. As in most packs the male leads and protects his family. Why is it an animal seems to know more about laying down his life for others then us humans? The male will fight to the death to protect what is his. Why does the human male give up when things get too tough?

There was a time when men opened car doors for their women. They pulled out the chair at dinner and made them feel special. What happened? Look at the romance novels women read. There is always a woman in some type of trouble and along comes their knight in shining armor. The knight not only will fight for his love but will also write her a poem, build her a house and be faithful forever more.

Women yearn for the romantic days of being the damsel in distress waiting for prince charming to rescue them. Men, it's time to rescue our women! Be Sir Lancelot or John Wayne. Sweep your woman off her feet. Be tender and loving but also decisive and strong. Take the lead and protect your pack!

It doesn't seem fair!

I heard that from our son the other day. Now he's not an 8 year old who can't go play with his friends. He's almost 30 with a wife and 2 kids. They are in some financial trouble and it seems to him that every time they get ahead something else happens. They make great money but are trying to dig out of debt which has been accumulated over the years.

As I said they have 2 beautiful daughters and they both like their jobs. They have a roof over their heads and are in good health. They can pay their bills, drive a nice car, go out to eat and take short trips. So what's the problem? Their plan to be debt free in 5 or so years has hit a snag and it will take much longer.

I listen to their problems and it sounds like so many others. I don't have this or can't do that etc. If being in debt is their biggest concern I say, be happy! Try having a child with a life threatening disease or your spouse have an affair. I would trade debt for my wife's affair any day.

Society has become so focused on money that we have forgotten what really is important. Guys work themselves into an early grave to support a family that wishes dad was home more. Mom busts her butt to get ahead when all the kids care about is will she make it to their school function. We have become consumed by things of this world and not things that are eternal. We save up riches on earth and then lose them with a market crash instead of saving up things that can't be taken from us.

I would hope this economic downturn opened some eyes to what is important. I, like so many others have little or no savings and live month to month but my wife and I are in what we call "the sweet spot". We finally realize what is really important and spend more of our time trying to serve others. In the long run we are only here for a short time and to worry about the car I drive or clothes I wear is not only short sighted but it also places us outside of God's will. When we are in His will everything comes together how He wants it to. Look at your life and if things aren't going how you think they should maybe you should re-evaluate your priorities.

Does history matter?

Websters defines history as “a chronological record of significant events (as affecting a nation or institution) often including an explanation of their causes.” So why learn it? George Santayana in the early 1900’s said “Those who do not remember the past are condemned to repeat it.” Plato said “History is the witness that testifies to the passing of time; it illumines reality, vitalizes memory, provides guidance in daily life and brings us tidings of antiquity.”

Currently Texas is in the middle of a controversy concerning the information contained in its schools history books. A group of conservative Christians have pushed their agenda on the school board to adopt their recommendations for the new books. The rhetoric between the conservative and liberal factions has been lively and is now getting national attention. So the question begs to be asked, “Are our school books biased and why is Texas taking this step?”

One answer might be because academia has for too long followed a liberal agenda. Religion has been looked upon as fables and fairy tales and should only be taught in Sunday school. Creation is theory but evolution is fact. The funny thing about that is in Darwins book, Origin of Species, he calls his thesis the Theory of Evolution. Somehow without being able to prove anything his theory has become fact. Sounds eerily like global warming. With selective facts this warming has gone from theory to fact. Maybe I’m exaggerating and schools really have no ideological leanings. Well, we just happen to have a debate in Tennessee about creation vs evolution. A current biology book calls creationism “the biblical myth” but states evolution as the Origin of Man. To think bias is non-existent is to bury our heads in the sand.

In any class in school there is only so much time to go over the material you want covered. In literature it’s deciding which books to read. In science it’s evolution vs creation (which Texas hashed out last year). In history it’s what and who is important to learn about in the limited time. While there are around 100 main changes being proposed the ones that have caused the most uproar are the ones with a religious teaching. This is what I will address here.

I think the root of all the issues is, should U.S. history contain Christian elements? I think it would be very hard to learn about the Pilgrims coming to America and not discuss religious persecution. As much as secularists want to ignore it I find it difficult to not look at the Constitution or our founding fathers and not see a belief in a Creator. It’s hard to talk about our past Presidents and their Ivy League educations and not mention that the Ivy League schools, for the most part, were originally Christian schools. Add to that the swearing in of the President on the Bible, In God We Trust on our money, our Pledge of Allegiance with the line “One Nation under God” and our sense of morals based on Old Testament Law not to mention The 10 Commandments posted in court houses. Like it or not U.S. history and religion are tightly woven together.

The majority of U.S. citizens call themselves Christian. To ignore that label would be no different than a black ignoring his color or a Jew his religion. Since everyone is not a Christian should everyone have to learn history through a Christian lens? I’m not black but we learn about the struggles they went through. I’m not Jewish but we learn about the Holocaust. To think that religion didn’t play a part in our country and doesn’t make us who we are would be like telling a black person slavery didn’t affect his ancestors which in turn affected him.

A Christian should no more ignore his roots than a black or Jew. Our past as well as our ancestors have made us who we are today. To not study why we think or do what we do would be the height of self centeredness.

Should we include Ronald Reagan but not Cesar Chavez? How about Nazi’s but not the KKK? Should all American Indians be looked upon as peace loving people before the white man came or should we talk about tribe on tribe massacres? These are debates that will continue but If we are talking about U.S. history then at some point someone has to make a decision to tell the truth and not bow to the PC crowd.

Will Texas go too far? Probably. But can you really blame them? When our grade school children are being read books about two princes being in love with each other. When our high school kids can’t take an aspirin but can have an appointment at the abortion clinic set up or instead of being taught abstinence they are given condoms there is something out of whack. At some point in time we lost our way and to many getting back to our roots and core beliefs is a great starting point.

So is teaching about a Creator and His moral laws more destructive to society then the gay agenda or radical feminism? I don’t see how but this brings us back to the original question should religion especially Christianity be looked at from a historical perspective when discussing how the U.S. got to be where it is today? Whether you’re Christian or not I see no way you can say religion has not played a major role in developing the attitudes of the people of this great country (for better or worse) and therefore should be included in any history lesson.

Are we reliving Old Testament times?

I was reading Joshua and came to the last chapter. In it, Joshua is old and doesn’t have long to live and he’s telling the people to remember God’s commandments and remember all that God has done for them. God brought great nations to their knees as Israel spread out after Moses died. Battle after battle God was with them and they always prevailed. Joshua goes on to say that if they forsake the Lord, he will turn and bring disaster on His people.

Something hit me when I heard that. The U.S. has been blessed for years. In battle after battle we have defeated our enemies but now it seems we are weaker and possibly don’t have the protection we once had. Terrorists now openly mock us and plot to kill us without fear. Foreign countries look at us with disdain and contempt and I wondered when this may have started. The Vietnam War is the only real defeat we have had in battle. It can be argued whether we were defeated or not but when hundreds of thousands of our soldiers die and we pull out without victory I would say that’s a defeat. The end of that war is considered March of 1973. If we lost God’s blessing around that time what would have caused that? The Supreme Court decision on Roe v Wade was January 1973. Coincidence or not? I don’t know but if we are to believe the Bible then the start of legalizing the killing of millions of babies may have lifted our protection.

If God’s blessing on this nation is gone can we get it back? If so when and how? One thing is certain we are under constant attack by terrorists both domestic and foreign. Not only militarily but also economically. Read the Old Testament and see what happened to God’s people when they angered God. It’s not a pretty sight.

35 days and counting

Last month our church was talking about prayer and fasting. We talked about the different fasts and different ways to fast. The one common message was we were to fast something that interfered with our time with God. Food has never been a big deal to me. I go without breakfast and lunch quite often. It seemed that the one thing that got between me and God was TV. It was often normal to flip on the tube at 7 and watch for a couple hours. It was veg time.

So 35 days ago we quit watching. This is during 24 and March Madness too. One thing I can tell you is we DO NOT miss it. We spend our evenings now doing our studies, going for a walk, reading etc. We use to go out to eat but always would check our watch so we could be home in time for a certain show. Now it doesn't matter. The freedom of not being tied to a TV schedule is amazing.

My walk with God has become much closer this past month. The books I've read have opened my eyes to deeper matters I may not have considered. Our desire to serve has increased along with the time to do it.

We are all given the same amount of hours a week. Why does it seem like some get so much more done? Maybe they've shut of the tube.

Christianity is not a spectator sport

It's that time of year, March Madness! Millions will fill out their brackets and spend the next few weeks watching their favorite teams vie for the crown. It's a distraction from the day to day grind and a chance to get away from real life.

For many, church and Christianity in general is like that. We stroll into the worship center, pay our admission(tithe) and sit back for the show. Great music, video screens and a riveting speaker make for a laid back hour or two. We forget the outside world and drift into a spirit of peace. As soon as the doors are opened and we leave the center we fall back into the way of the world.

Christianity is not to be watched. We are not part of a play and watch the actors on stage. This is not our favorite team and we are not remembering when we used to be playing for the championship. We don't come to church to get something from it but we are to come to give something to it. We are to be actively engaged in the Christian life. We are called to serve, minister and love one another using the gifts God has bestowed upon us.

This year be part of the team. You've got the best coach ever and a supporting cast that is amazing. You're never too old or too far gone. So get up, get off the bench and get in the game!

God, send me a sign!

It's strange and a little sad how we are continually searching for a sign on what to do. This sign may come from God, Mother Nature or our belief in aliens. What's really sad is when a believer in Christ wonders "Is this a sign from God?"

During the period of my wife's affair she told of many times she would run into the other guy and would think "This just can't be coincidence". She would bump into him in a store or hitting balls at the driving range. Surly, she would say to herself, this isn't by chance. God wants us to be together! Add in the fact that this guy was a socializer (which I'm not) and liked to dance (which I don't) and the signs were just all over the place.

She would say something like "I know God brought him into my life for a reason".

Pardon for this interruption I just had to answer the door and was greeted by two elderly people inviting me to their church for Easter. A very nice couple of Jehovah's Witnesses. Now, was this a sign I should convert? If not, then why are some things that happen to us a sign and others aren't? Could it possibly be that our "signs" are actually our flesh giving us the go ahead to do things God would deem unacceptable? OK, back to the story.

Isn't it ironic that she was consumed with a sign from God, when God was clearly speaking to her through the Bible. Doctrine teaches us about the authority of His Word. God's Word is the path and final word on our lives. Forget our feelings and emotions, forget signs and hunches.

When you plead to God to send you a sign, remember He already did. His Word is true and will never change.

God knows your Google search

Everything you want to know about anything can be found with the click of the mouse. From the lyrics to the Flintstones to the temperature in New Zealand in August of 1977. We use the Internet to do research on term papers, buy airline tickets and keep up with friends. But what else do we do online? When no one is looking what sights are we surfing?

The vast resources available on the world wide web can also have destructive consequences. Porn, emotional affairs and voyeuristic tendencies are all easily found with one click of a button. No matter what you think, you're not sneaking away with anything. There is One who sees your every click and knows your every search. If your earthly parents were watching you surf would you be more careful in what you viewed? Remember your heavenly Father is also watching and He sees it all.

Are chick flicks emotional porn?

Porn may be a little strong but are there some similarities? In an article by Laura Leonard in Christianity Today she says "while traditional pornography appeals to men’s visual instincts and creates a false physical ideal of the female body, so the argument goes, chick flicks create in women a false emotional ideal of romance and marriage." Later in the article she reasons "Any time we say, or even think, “I wish I could find a guy like that” we are buying into a dangerous ideal of romance and marriage that just does not exist. Just as I do not want to be compared to a porn star, guys don’t want to be compared to Richard Gere. These movies can fuel a belief in “the one” — an obsession that celebrates the will of the heart, which “is deceitful above all things,” and disregards the qualities that will push a relationship through difficult times."

So what is it about chick flicks, or romance novels, that make them so appealing? Is it the physical attributes of the male hero or the happily ever after scenario? Is it the escape from an otherwise boring or less than fulfilling life? Perhaps the comparison to porn is only an apt analogy depending on the mindset of the viewer. Are the 90 minutes spent watching "The Notebook" just for fun or does the viewer end up comparing men to fictional heroes and disregarding the qualities that are actually important — faith, character, regard for others — in favor of physical attraction or chemistry? If it's the latter is it that much different than porn?

Honey, is the door locked?

A simple question usually asked at 10 PM after I'm in bed. "I think so" is the logical response especially since I have no idea but assume it is. I think so to a man means yes. I think so to a woman means no. I think so to a man means it probably is and even if it isn't I'm not worried about it. I think so to a woman means it might not be so I won't be able to sleep because someone might break in.

Men & women react so differently to what they hear and see that sometimes you have to wonder if we are from the same gene pool. When a man is in bed he's done for the night. A women gets in bed and still has 40 things on her mind that either should have been done or need to be done tomorrow. Ex: Mr. "I think so" has hinted that it would be a great night for a little romance to the Mrs. He hops into bed and there is only one thing on his mind as he watches his bride of 30 years get ready. All systems are go and we are ready for takeoff. The little woman snuggles up, gives him a kiss on the cheek and then mentions she talked to her mom today and she is coming to visit. She proceeds to tell hubby that means the living room needs to be painted and that leaky faucet will have to get fixed. Which reminds her that the toilet backed up and the plumber is coming out tomorrow. All Mr. "I think so" hears is "I wonder if anything is going to happen tonight". He really has no idea what was said.

It doesn't do any good to get mad at her for having so many things on her mind just as it doesn't do any good for her to get mad at him for desiring her all the time. We're different and we are supposed to be! God made us the way we are for a reason. Maybe discovering that reason and embracing it is part of the reason.

So smile to yourself, get up and check the door that is probably already locked. It takes seconds but sends a message to her that you value her and don't want her to worry. Tomorrow night when you get in bed just make sure you've already checked the door!

Avoiding Pain

Our daughter-in-law was stung by a scorpion the other night. The pain was short lived but still excruciating. A while back I broke a tooth and because it wasn't bothering me I didn't go see a dentist. A few months later my jaw began to ache so I went in and found out I needed a root canal. If I had gone in right away I could have just got by with a filling but over time an infection set in so more work was needed. Pain is a signal to us to make a change.

We do all we can to avoid pain. We ignore the pain in our marriage until the divorce papers are served. We ignore the pain at work caused by too many hours by telling ourselves we are doing this for our family and have no other choice until we realize we once again missed our daughters birthday party. We mask the pain in our chest with drugs until we are carried off on a stretcher. Pain is God's way of getting our attention and telling us to fix things or make a change!

Pain is not punishment from God but rather His way to wake us up. Genesis 3:17 says "Cursed is the ground for your sake" NKJV. It doesn't say for your punishment but your sake! Pain tells us something is wrong. Without the pain we would continue to do the same activity causing the pain. Without pain we would ignore the scorpion, we would ignore our marriage problems and our hearts.

The next time you feel pain ask yourself what is causing the pain and what should you do to correct it. Remember God also knows pain. He sent His son to us to endure all of our sins and pain and then die a horribly painful death on the cross. If He endured the pain of the death of His son to lay the path for us to be united with Him in heaven maybe we should use our pain to not only fix things in our lives but also to help guide others.

The Ultimate Life Threatening Disease

We all probably know or know about someone with a disease that if left unchecked is life threatening. It is tragic to watch someone waste away in the last years of their life. It is even more tragic knowing that many of these disease's could have been prevented. What many of us don't want to acknowledge is that we ALL suffer from a terminal illness. That illness that threatens our lives is sin.

Our bodies will one day cease to function, that's a given. But our bodies have always been just a temporary holding place for our soul. Our bodies are of this world and thus subject to the laws and conditions of this world. Our souls however were created to exist forever. Whether you believe in God or not your soul will live on. It will either live with our Creator on the new earth or live in constant torment in Hell.

Jesus has given us a way to live with Him forever but we must accept His invitation. Just like preventing a bodily disease we can also prevent a spiritual one. How tragic it is to lose a loved one knowing you will not be seeing them again in Heaven.

The Ultimate Life Threatening Disease? Sin, but there is a cure. Just ask the Great Physician.

Dealing with Trials

The car needs $1200 worth of work, AGAIN! That's over $3000 in repairs in the last year. Business is slow and there's no cash in the bank. Why now God and why so much!? It may not be your car. It could be your kids, your spouse or your job. You want to ask God "Why am I going through this?"

As Christians we often think we are immune to the trials everyone else goes through. After all we pray, we go to church, we are in a small group and for the most part we are darn good people! Why God, why this, why me, why now?

Let's see what scripture says. James 1:2 states "Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds." So I'm supposed to be happy I owe money I don't have? The word joy does not mean happiness. Joy is a supernatural experience in the purpose or people of God. Joy only happens to followers of Christ! But why should I still feel joy when I can't pay the bill or my wife won't talk to me? The next verse says "for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness." So a trial is a test of your faith. Trials separate the men from the boys, the imposters from the authentic.

Verse 3 says that trials produce steadfastness. The New Kings James says trials produce patience. Patience, a word we love to hate. In today's "I want it now society" patience usually means "I'll wait until tomorrow before I freak out." Look at Verse 4 "And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing." So we are to have patience until God is done with His work in us for that trial. How long will that be? Ecclesiates 3:1 says "For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven." A season may be a day, a year or a decade. We are to follow God's timetable not ours. But with patience Job 23:10 tells us "But he knows the way that I take; when he has tried me, I shall come out as gold."

Do not be surprised or angered when your trail comes upon you. Look at it as a test from God in which He is preparing you for something greater. 1 Peter 4:12-13 "Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice insofar as you share Christ’s sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed."

Embrace your trials and feel Blessed that God cares enough about you to put you through the fire.

Attending 2 church's

Life gives us a smorgasbord of choices. We have 160 channels on TV, unlimited books and magazines to read and thousands of choices for tonight's dinner. All this is wonderful and a perk of living in the greatest nation on earth. But we seem to be expected to attend only one church at a time. Is this scriptural or cultural? If we are worshipping God and serving in both church's, does it matter?

No church is perfect and no church can meet the needs of each member but let's suppose Church A has a great Pastor that really can strike a chord with you when it comes to understanding and following the Gospel. He makes it come alive. Church B has classes and programs designed to promote spiritual growth that church A doesn't. Is it wrong to attend both (if 2 services a week don't bother you)? What about attending a small group from each church?

If the church's are the same theologically is there a problem with splitting your allegiance? Or are we commanded to make one church our home church even if it doesn't fill some of our needs? In the end aren't they all God's church and would He really care where or how many we attend as long as we are doing His will?

Tiger Woods is not alone

Today Tiger Woods gave his long awaited apology to the world. He said all the right things. He said he was sorry. He said he is the only one to blame and felt he was entitled. He felt the rules were not for him. He said his actions over time will mean more than his words. He said he needs to get back to a balance of his spiritual and professional life and remember what is important.

A nice apology and I'm sure he means what he says but Tigers actions are just a microcosm of today's society. Being one of the worlds most recognizable people maybe, just maybe, some of the average everyday men will see themselves and the destruction they are causing their families. Infidelity, adultery, sex addiction, whatever you want to call it is rampant. Statistics show that 60-80% of men will have an affair at sometime in their lives. Why? What is it in the male brain that thinks we can bed anyone we want for a few moments of pleasure and that no one will get hurt? What makes Christian men especially think they can ignore not only society's rules but also God's laws and no harm will come?

The number of unwed mom's is out of control. Prostitution for many is not even considered a crime. Porn addiction is skyrocketing and adultery is rampant. What do all these "indiscretions" have in common? MEN! It is time for the male of society to step up and be the man God intended us to be. It is time for us to keep our pants up and do what is morally right. It is time for us to serve our women and society. It is time for us to ask for forgiveness from our wives, our kids and our God for thinking only of ourselves. It is time we are humbled and brought to our knees. It is irresponsible to think we can be self centered and do anything we want and not pay the consequences. It is time for men to be men!

Hopefully, Tiger will make some out there look at themselves and not like what they see. Through Christ we all the have the chance to start again for we are forgiven. It's never too late to say "I'm, Sorry". One thing Tiger said was it's not what you achieve but what you overcome. That reminds me of the Poem "The Race".

Defeat! He lay there silently, a tear dropped from his eye,"
There's no sense running anymore- three strikes and I'm out- why try?"
The will to rise has disappeared, all hope had fled away,
so far behind, so error prone, closer all the way.

"I've lost, so what's the use," he thought "I'll live with my disgrace."
But then he thought about his dad who soon he'd have to face.
Get up, and echo sounded low, get up and take your place.
You were not meant for failure here, so get up and win the race.
With Borrowed will, "Get up!", It said, "You haven't lost at all,
for winning is not more than this, to rise each time you fall."

So he rose to win once more, and with new commitment he resolved to win
or lose, at least he wouldn't quit.
So far behind the others now, the most he'd ever been,
still he gave it all he had, and ran as though to win.
Three times he'd fallen stumbling, three times he rose again.
To far behind to hope to win, he still ran to the end.

They cheered the winning runner as he crossed.
First place, head high and proud and happy, no falling, no disgrace.
But when the fallen youngster crossed the line, last place,
the crowd gave him the greater cheer for finishing the race.
And even though he came in last, with head bow low, unproud.
You would have thought he won the race, to listen to the crowd.
And to his dad he sadly said, "I didn't do so well."
To me, you won, his father said, you rose each time you fell.

And now when things seem dark and hard and difficult to face,
the memory of that little boy helps me in my own race.
For all of life is like that race, with ups and downs and all.
And all you have to do to win is rise each time you fall.
"Quit! Give up you're beaten," they will shout in my face.
But another voice within me says, "Get up and win that race!"

God is your Father, Get up and Win the Race!!!!!!!!

Jesus was Gay

According to master theologian, Elton John, Jesus was a gay man. In an interview with Parade magazine John says "I think Jesus was a compassionate, super-intelligent gay man who understood human problems."

I guess that adds new meaning to "Love your neighbor."

Is God enough

From Gary Thomas

Genesis 2:18 – “The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him."

Adam walked with God, enjoyed God, worshiped God, and talked with God – far more intensely and directly than we do today. And, yet it was God who said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. God literally told Adam, “It is my opinion that the way you are living - just me and you - is not enough, or at least not for now.”

But, when asked, “Is Jesus enough?,” most Christ followers are challenged to offer an unqualified “yes.” In a similar example, the true answer to the question, “Are bread and water enough to keep me alive?” is also yes. Does this mean, then that we should disdain fruit, meat, and even the occasional slice of cake if those foods are available?

In some lives and in some situations, there will be “only” Jesus. We may lose a spouse, our children, our home - seemingly every enjoyment we have. And, in those situations, yes, we will find that he is, really and truly, enough. But, I believe wisdom teaches us that such lives are entered into only under God’s providence. They are not to be pursued as self-imposed obligations.

Prayer, worship, Bible study, and fellowship are the bread of the spiritual life, but they are not the only remedies for our ailing souls. Indeed, they become even more effective when joined with other holy “creational” pleasures. When you feel free – indeed, feel determined – to cultivate and enjoy soul-filling pleasures, you will live so full you won’t have much time to dwell on the negative or the illicit. This is God’s intended, more powerful way to live in relationship with Christ, to worship him, and show his goodness to a hungry world.

Will the Austin pilot be labeled a Christian radical?

You can already hear it coming.

"Austin suicide pilot was former church planter"

In an attempt to avoid taxes, Joe Stack had started his own church. He was disgusted with what he called the Catholic Church's corruption so he tried to get the same breaks they do. $40,000 later he found out it didn't work. If he isn't branded a religious nut it's for sure he will be called a right wing extremist. His disgust with the government is well documented.

What I want to know is will the media spend as much time on the Alabama professor that killed 3 colleagues and was a staunch Obama supporter as they will on Joe Stack?

Should the word retarded be banned?

Sarah Palin jumped on Rahm Emanuel a couple weeks ago for using the word retarded in describing some Democrats who oppose the Administration. Since then the "R" word has been treated like the "N" word. Is this political correctness run amok?

As a highly visible Christian and Conservative Palin has made hay with Rahm's comment. Should we ban a word just because it offends someone? How about the words fatso, baldy, slut or idiot? Does banning a word change the attitude? Let's say we ban the word and instead call a handicapped person "special". Now every time someone calls a child special won't it bring up the same feeling as retarded. In time will special be banned?

As they say, you can't legislate morality. Until you change society's attitude towards any word banning that word will hardly make a difference. It is somewhat hypocritical of conservatives to make this an issue when they have been on the forefront to stop the PC crowd from censoring anything that offends someone.

Change peoples hearts and their vocabulary will change.

Should we care about our politicians religion?

George Bush wore his Christianity on his sleeve. Barack Obama says he's a Christian but hasn't seen a church in a while. We are told JFK was a devout(don't know how devout with his affairs) Catholic and Mitt Romney was a proud Mormon. Does it matter today what a politicians religion is?

Unlike many blog sites I see I have to say YES! I am not talking about a Christian in name only but one that actually tries to follow God's word. I could not vote for someone with no moral compass. He or she may be a wonderful person and lived an exemplary life but with only their own moral background what decisions will they make when their back is to the wall? Now a Christian can fall and make mistakes, no doubt about it but I would feel more comfortable if they had a real belief in God and were trying to follow His lead in all they do. How someone lives his life is important to me when I'm asking him to lead my country. If he cheated on his wife will he give in to temptation in D.C.? If he is known for a bad temper or has abused his kids will he fly off the handle when things get tough with Iran?

Before anyone gets all excited I'm not talking about establishing any certain religion as the designated religion. All I'm talking about is knowing where someone gets their ideology.

If our politicians take the oath of office on the Bible shouldn't we hold them to that standard? And if we aren't going to keep them accountable why do the dog and pony show at the swearing in? Let them swear to whatever or whoever will guide them. It could be a tree, a beer bottle or an astrologer. At least this way we know what we are getting.

Should we all strive for ministry?

I was in my 40's when I started my walk with God and for the first few years I constantly felt I was letting God down because I was working in the secular world and not a full time ministry job. So I did ministry "on the side" while continuing my full time job. What I found was it was very difficult to do both at a high level of competency.

We love marriage ministry and would do that full time given the opportunity but not having retirement money to live on we continue to work. We have cut back in our church ministries but what we have found is ministry opportunities continue to come to us. These opportunities are from our small group, our family and our friends. We are as busy as ever but not in an organized manner.

An essay by Dorothy Sayers entitled "Why Work" says it better than I can. "Christians must get it firmly into their heads that when a man or woman is called to a particular job of secular work, that is as true a vocation as though he or she were called to a specific religious work."

In doing the work that God gifted us for—whether it be truck driver, politician or a plumber—does not make us second-class Christians nor Christians who aren't doing the work of Christ. We are people who are worshipping God with the abilities He gave us and expects us to use no matter our place in society.

Women cheat too!

Look up adultery on google and you will see over 6 million different sites listed. Look closely and see how many cover the aspect of adultery where the woman is the cheater. View your churches ministries and see if there is one for men who have been cheated on. My bets are there aren't any. I found this out when I was cheated on. Why does society think men are the only ones who commit adultery and even if it's the wife who goes astray, the man should be able to take it?

The feminist movement told women that they could do everything a man could do. That they had the same rights to follow their dreams just like men. The past 40+ years have showed us that the NOW gang was right. Women now have more heart disease, high blood pressure and affairs then they used to. Welcome gals to our world!

As more women sow their wild oats they will find the hollowness of infidelity. And as more men are cheated on they (the men) will find the intense pain that has long been relegated to the female species. The effects on a man are different than a woman when it comes to infidelity. While a woman generally seeks emotional connection a man is looking for that physical relationship which in turn produces the emotional relationship. I'm not an expert in this field but from my own experience and from others I've talked to a man is hurt in a different but equally painful way.

A man has an ego! I know that's a shock. Much of his self esteem comes from being all those things society tells us makes a man. Bread-winner, strong, daring and of course, great in bed. This last one is probably the biggest. If you don't think so then why are there so many "male-enhancement" commercials on TV? Remember all the stories and jokes in the locker room about sex and a guys sexual prowess? Sex to a man is Big! There is hardly anything worse to a man then when his wife gives her body to another man. The questions fill your head. How did it happen? How good was the sex? How many times? Was he better than me? The "why did it happen" comes after all the questions about the actual act.

So where does a man go? For me I had to keep it to myself for the most part. I spent most of my time trying to heal my wife and never thought about healing myself. It actually wasn't until recently that my wife and I sat down and I opened up to her about my thoughts. I had questions about the affair but didn't know if I really wanted the answers but I knew the only way to truly heal was to get everything into the light. Nothing satan likes better then to keep our thoughts to ourselves in the dark recesses of our minds to be used when he wants to make us question our marriage.

I wish every self centered man out there could feel the pain I felt. This is the same pain he causes his wife when he cheats on her. Once you experience it you would not wish to ever hurt anyone like that. Men, don't keep it to yourselves. Talk it out with someone. It will only eat you alive if you keep it hidden.

Does Christian tradition matter?

These lines are from a book by Joshua Harris called Dug Down Deep.

The bottom line is that my parents' faith wasn't really my faith. I knew how to work the system, I knew the Christian lingo, but my heart wasn't in it. My heart was set on enjoying the moment. During my early twenties I went through a phase of blaming the church I had attended in high school for all my spiritual deficiencies. Evangelical megachurches make good punching bags. My reasoning went something like this: I was spiritually shallow because the pastors' teaching had been shallow. I wasn't fully engaged because they hadn't done enough to grab my attention. I was a hypocrite because everyone else had been a hypocrite. I didn't know God because they hadn't provided enough programs. Or they hadn't provided the right programs. Or maybe they'd had too many programs. All I knew was that it was someone else's fault.

I mostly floated through grown-up church. Like a lot of teenagers in evangelical churches, I found my sense of identity and community in the parallel universe of the youth ministry. Our youth group was geared to being loud, fast paced, and fun. It was modeled on the massive and influential, seeker-sensitive Willow Creek Community Church located outside Chicago. The goal was simple: put on a show, get kids in the building, and let them see that Christians are cool, thus Jesus is cool. We had to prove that being a Christian is, contrary to popular opinion and even a few annoying passages of the Bible, loads of fun. Admittedly it's not as much fun as partying and having sex but pretty fun nonetheless. Sad to say, I spent more time studying my dance moves for that show than I was ever asked to invest in studying about God. Maybe I wouldn't have been interested in youth group if it hadn't been packaged in fun and games and a good band. But I still wish someone had expected more of me—of all of us.

When we talk about knowledge of God, we're talking about theology. Simply put, theology is the study of the nature of God—who he is and how he thinks and acts. But theology isn't high on many people's list of daily concerns. I've come to learn that theology matters. And it matters not because we want a good grade on a test but because what we know about God shapes the way we think and live. What you believe about God's nature—what he is like, what he wants from you, and whether or not you will answer to him—affects every part of your life. Theology matters, because if we get it wrong, then our whole life will be wrong. We're either building our lives on the reality of what God is truly like and what he's about, or we're basing our lives on our own imagination and misconceptions. We're all theologians. The question is whether what we know about God is true. The word orthodoxy literally means "right opinion." In the context of Christian faith, orthodoxy is shorthand for getting your opinion or thoughts about God right. It is teaching and beliefs based on the established, proven, cherished truths of the faith. These are the truths that don't budge. They're clearly taught in Scripture and affirmed in the historic creeds of the Christian faith.

Orthodoxy matters because the Christian faith is not just a cultural tradition or moral code. Orthodoxy is the irreducible truths about God and his work in the world. Our faith is not just a state of mind, a mystical experience, or concepts on a page. Theology, doctrine, and orthodoxy matter because God is real, and he has acted in our world, and his actions have meaning today and for all eternity

Porn destroys another relationship

Adult movies, men's magazines, gentleman's clubs. Call it whatever you want but the viewing of scantily clad women is big business. How big? The 2005 revenue from porn was $12.5 billion. 45 million people access porn on the internet each month. Approximately 70% of men between 18-34 report viewing monthly. 47% of families say porn is a problem in their home. A 2000 Christianity Today survey of clergy showed that 33% said they had viewed a sexually explicit website.

Porn is a seductive mistress promising more than she can deliver. Initially the viewing of material may not seem to be a problem but the male brain is wired in such a way that viewing a sexually explicit picture releases a pleasure producing hormone. Over time we require more explicit pictures to get the same "high". Ultimately more time viewing or riskier behavior is needed to produce the desired high. This is when relationships fail and men are destroyed.

This was made clear to me by a young couple we were mentoring before their marriage. Something was off with the groom to be and after some long discussions he came clean about his addiction. He thought he could keep it under control but his fiance could tell there was a problem. Their wedding was postponed six weeks before the ceremony and my young friend looked to me to help him with his problem. We were to meet last week and he couldn't make it. He didn't show up tonight either. I can't get hold of him and fear it's a battle he isn't ready to tackle. I also fear he has no idea the power it has over his life.

Men, please talk to your sons about porn. Give them the books and articles. Porn today is a serious problem that with the internet only makes the problem worse.

Tebow Super Bowl Ad

After all the comments from both sides of the abortion issue you would have thought this ad was going to be a defining moment in history. Not so. Whether it was intentional or not Focus sucked the critics in and then showed an ad that was simple, short and void of the "A" word. It made Planned Parenthood look like a bunch of hyped up unaborted kids on sugar. They were running around screaming about things that didn't happen and the publicity Focus on the Family got was worth much more then the cost of the ad.

The abortion debate will continue but the tide has turned. A Pro Family ad on prime time coupled with an increase in more young adults saying they are pro life means the eventual end of this destructive (to both the mom and her child) procedure.

Are Christians the New Negro?

Read the Rev. Ken Hutchersons entire article at WorldNetDaily.com.

Many reading this may not understand where I came up with this concept of calling Christians "the new Negro."
The reason is because there are undeniable similarities. Jim Crow laws were passed to keep me from having my constitutional rights and my rights under the Declaration of Independence of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Even though the Constitution gave me those freedoms, man was smart enough to be able to keep me from living those freedoms by saying I was "separate but equal."
Today, my constitutional right of freedom of religion is being eroded again by laws such as the Hate Crimes Bill and repeated attacks by the politically correct crowd. Threats that came along as a result of an African American wanting to get out from under Jim Crow laws were formidable and scary and designed to keep African Americans quiet. The same thing is happening to Christians today.

Another way secular society is trying to control Christians is by the fallacy of the separation of church and state. That establishment clause was intended to protect the church from the state, not to keep the church from participating in the state. Christians' ignorance of the meaning of the establishment clause has allowed us to be controlled just like the African Americans were in the 1950s and '60s.

If you don't believe one could be attacked for one's stand on Judeo-Christian beliefs alone, take the case of Miss California, Carrie Prejean. Look at her refusal to compromise her Christian values. She has been vilified and demonized and lost her title simply because of her constitutional right to freedom of religion. What is so encouraging is that she will not compromise; she will not give up her values and would rather please God than take what the world has to offer her.

Sarah Palin is another example.
The politically correct crowd has a very difficult time dealing with Sarah because of who she is. Mrs. Palin is a pro-life, pro-gun, pro-traditional-marriage, pro-hunting, white, conservative, Christian male who happened to have been born a woman! The politically correct crowd knows exactly what to do with a white male with those attributes, but a woman?
She is the perfect picture of the politically correct woman – strong, beautiful, able to both buy and fry the bacon, take care of the family, run an entire state and still take care of her baby. But because of who she is, and because she does not subscribe to politically correct thinking, she has been attacked for no other reason than her Judeo-Christian values, just as African Americans were attacked for no other reason than their skin color.

The only difference between Christians and African Americans is that Christians put up with this intolerance while standing behind the false disguise of humility and love. We are obsessed with showing the world our love when our primary job is to tell them the truth. The Bible does not say, "Sensitivity shall set you free." It says, "The truth shall set you free." Are we not the truth-tellers?
When are we as believers, like the African Americans that came before us, going to say, enough is enough? No more "separate but equal!" Our battle cry is "We are the salt of the earth, onward Christian soldiers and to God be the glory! For in unity we will stand and we will not be stopped!"

Kurt Warner Retires

Friday Kurt Warner retired from football. Guys retire all the time but this one was special. Since his days in Iowa and then with the Rams I have been a big fan of Warner's. Part of it had to do with his moral compass and part because I had him on my fantasy football team in back to back years and won the league both years!

I was not a follower of Christ then but I knew he was a man worth believing in. In a world where athletes too often get attention for embarrassing or illegal problems Kurt has been a pillar of light. He is a man not confused of Who is in control. The year after Warner and the Rams won the Super Bowl Kurt was often injured and started 0-6. His comment to that period in his life was "It was the greatest year of his life because of the spiritual growth I went through". He continued "I grew more than I could ever have expected, while going through such a difficult situation". Not many in his situation would have seen the positive in being benched.

Today as a follower of Christ I find his steadfastness even more remarkable. I now know how hard it is to follow God in all you do when the world is doing all it can to get you to stumble.

Kurt, you will be missed but never forgotten. I pray you continue to bring glory to God in all you do. Thanks for the memories!